If you’re like most people, you wanna have a successful relationship. But unfortunately, most relationships fail –but that’s okay. So what are the biggest relationship killers? And more importantly, how can you avoid them? In episode #154 of the PUSH Podcast, we talked about things you should AVOID having in common with your partner or spouse if you want a better chance of your relationship surviving. So often we hear tips on what to look for in a partner but not so much what you shouldn’t have in COMMON. You can take a listen to hear that full list now or read on to learn eight things you SHOULD NOT have in common with your partner if you want your relationship to survive!

It’s Best to have different TEMPERAMENTS!

When it comes to relationships, it’s often said that opposites attract. But when it comes to temperaments, couples may be better off if they’re not too similar. Having the same quick temper can lead to arguments that escalate quickly and can be difficult to resolve. One partner may always end up being the “level-headed” one, which can lead to resentment. It’s important for each partner to be able to express their emotions, but it’s also important to have someone in the relationship who can keep a cool head during arguments. Otherwise, tempers may flare and the relationship may suffer.

Try avoid working at the same place!

As anyone who has ever worked in a office can attest, it can be difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with your co-workers, let alone when your co-worker is your partner, or spouse. There are always going to be differences of opinion and occasional conflict. And when you add in the stress of trying to meet deadlines and complete projects, it can be even tougher. Now imagine trying to do all of that while also being in a romantic relationship with someone who works at the same company. It can be tough enough to keep your professional and personal lives separate when you work for different companies. But when you work for the same company, it can be next to impossible. There are just too many opportunities for things to go wrong. You may end up competing with each other for projects or promotions. Or you may start to resent each other if one of you is perceived to be doing better than the other. And if things do go wrong in your relationship, it can make going into work every day a real nightmare. For all of these reasons, it’s generally best for couples not to work for the same company. It’s just too risky.

Couples shouldn’t have the same parents!

This one is pretty self-explanatory. It’s disturbing and gross!

Don’t do it!

You shouldn’t have the same PHOBIAS!

Let’s talk PHOBIAS! Fear of heights, fear of snakes, fear of the dark… These are all phobias that can cause big problems in a relationship if both people have them. Somebody has to be the one to kill the spider, when the other one can’t. Your partner has to be able to talk you off the ledge. This can be difficult when you’re both afraid of the same things. It’s important to be able to talk about your fears and phobias with your partner so that you can work together to overcome them. Having different phobias can actually be a good thing in a relationship, as it gives you both someone to lean on when you’re feeling scared. So don’t be afraid to have differences in your phobias, it could actually make your relationship stronger.

Avoid having the SAME TRIGGERS!

When it comes to stress, two is not always better than one. In fact, having the same stressors can often lead to more frequent and intense episodes of stress. One person needs to be cool, calm, and collected when the other is triggered and freaking out. Otherwise, the situation can quickly escalate and become overwhelming for both parties. It’s important to have someone who can remain level-headed in a crisis, so that you can both work together to find a solution. Having different stressors can actually be a good thing, as it gives you a chance to support each other through tough times.

Both parties shouldn’t feel like they have to WIN all the time!

There’s going to be fights, disagreements, and if you’re both trying to win all the damn time, then that’s gonna be a problem. It’s not helpful in a relationship when both parties are keeping score of who’s winning and who isn’t. If you’re in a relationship, it’s important to remember that not every disagreement has to be a win-or-lose situation. In fact, it’s often more harmful than helpful when both partners are constantly trying to one-up each other. It creates a competitive environment where scorekeeping becomes more important than resolving the actual issue at hand. This can lead to a lot of resentment and hurt feelings, so it’s important to try to avoid this kind of mindset. Instead, focus on finding win-win solutions that satisfy both parties involved. With a little effort, you can create a more harmonious relationship where everyone feels like a winner.

Both parties shouldn’t be INDECISIVE!

Making decisions can be hard, especially when you’re trying to please both yourself and your partner. However, it’s important to remember that both partners shouldn’t be indecisive! Otherwise, you’ll never get anything accomplished. If one partner is always the one who has to make the decision, it can lead to resentment. Alternatively, if both partners are constantly changing their minds, it can be frustrating and make decision making very difficult. The key is to find a happy medium where both partners feel comfortable with the decision making process. Talk to each other about what decision making style works best for both of you and compromise when necessary. With a little bit of effort, you’ll be able to find a system that works for both of you and helps avoid arguments about decision making in the future.

You shouldn’t share the SAME EX!

One of the worst things you can do in a new relationship is to have the same exes. It’s a recipe for disaster. If you and your partner are still on good terms with your exes, it’s only going to make things awkward. You’re constantly comparing your current partner to your ex, and that’s not fair to either of you. It also puts a strain on your relationship because you’re always wondering what your ex is doing. If you and your partner can’t stay away from each other’s exes, then maybe you’re not meant to be together. Just a thought…

We hope you found this list helpful. Do you agree with it? What would you add? Let us know in the comments below! And if you’re still looking for your perfect match, be open and keep looking! You never know where you’ll meet your Prince Charming.